Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Sick and Tired

As I've struggled with a dozy of a head cold this weak and am still recovering from a little eye surgery, I've had an epiphany so to speak about what is and is not important in my life. 

Being Sick and Tired and my body feeling about as bad as it can be for too many days has given my mind some time to work over time....but this has been a good thing.  It's amazing when you're at a low point how so many things in your life seem so trivial, so unimportant, so wasteful and as we look deeper we start to see just how much time we've wasted on those things......at least I do.

Yep....I'm Sick....and I'm Tired...and I know that puts my mind in a low place and yep, sometimes a bad mood.  With the new year I've really been working on taking back my life, not letting my circumstances rule my days and not giving excuses any more for the disappointments and lack of achievements in my life.  Yet this week I've caught my self yelling at me, having conversations with other people that aren't there (no I'm not delusional, just sick and tired), telling them what I really think of their insanity and instability and just getting out a lot of grief, frustration and anger which I guess can be a good thing.

I know when the fever is gone and the head is cleared up, I will feel like a new man, happy, refreshed, relieved and back to normal.  It's like having a bad day.... when you Sleep On It.... things seem so much better, calmer and not near as bad as they seemed the day before......something I've learned and am still learning.  So when I'm no longer Sick and Tired .....life will look better....but....I think it will be better as well.  I really have taken a second look at what I do with so much of my time and realized just how senseless, trivial and wasteful those things are.  We wonder sometimes why we have to get sick or why things happen the way they do but I know God is in control and these things happen for a reason.....even getting a head cold.

Hmmmmmmmm....Interesting.....
Maybe next time I get sick....even though I'll feel like crap......I'll look at it with a different attitude.  Instead of why me....maybe I will say.....

Thank You Lord........

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